My lions show up in the morning. Their roars as they walk around the bed remind me that Tim is gone, that another day has dawned and he’s not here…

For those of you who might know nothing about me, I was married to Tim Ysteboe. Tim and I had three children: Lisa, Charlie and Matt. Charlie preceded Tim to heaven when he was four months old. We have five wonderful grandchildren. Tim fought for two years against colon cancer which metastasized to the liver and the prognosis of “no cure.” His career path took us from Lutheran Brethren Seminary to Word of Life Lutheran Brethren Church in Le Sueur, Minnesota, to Hillside Lutheran Brethren Church, Succasunna, New Jersey, to Fergus Falls, Minnesota and the seminary, and then back to Succasunna again. Tim had dreamed of having ten years here before retirement.

One of the last weekends before Tim went home to his Savior, we spent much of the time around the kitchen table with dear friends. Our conversation turned to heaven and what it must be like. We haven’t been told very much, and I think it is likely because we just aren’t able to picture or understand it. One of the comments that day was “Tim is going to a place where there is no time.” Wrap your mind around that – I can’t.

Time has continued to march on for me since November 2 last year. The days come and go; some are better than others. But one thing is constant as the days go by. God has blessed me in many ways – a loving family, my own and my church family, a lovely home to live in, a good job with great people, friends, etc. I can say that there are fewer of the “I can’t stop crying” days. And time goes on.

When you consider Daniel and what he must have faced with those lions, the night must have seemed endless. I wonder how God ministered to him that night. Did he remind Daniel of blessings, of past victories and faithfulness? Daniel must have felt fear as that stone was placed over the cave. We know he was a man of prayer, so I’m thinking he spent a good deal of the time talking to God. Did the lions seem ferocious or did God make them sleepy or friendly? Whatever happened, the night passed, and the king showed up. Daniel 6:23 records: “And when Daniel was lifted from the den, no wound was found on him, because he had trusted in his God."

I would love to have that complete trust – mine wavers. When I face the lions at night or in the morning, I can only return to God and remember his blessings, past victories and faithfulness. And time marches on. “But I trust in you, O Lord; I say you are my God. My times are in your hands” (Psalm 31:14-15a).

The God who loves us sent his Son into our world with time so that we can be redeemed and go to a place where there is no time. Isn’t that encouraging? Tim struggled at the end that his time here was coming to an end. He “wrestled” with God one night because he wanted more time to get his work done, another book to finish, more sermons to preach, time with his family, etc. His struggles are over. His times were in God’s hands. Often the song from a few years back buzzes in my mind:

In his time, in his time.
He makes all things
beautiful in his time.
Lord, please show me ev’ry day,
As you’re teaching me your way
That you do just what you say
in your time.

God is faithful, God is good. I can trust him.

Rachel Ysteboe is the wife of the late Dr. Tim Ysteboe and attends Hillside LBC, Succasunna, NJ

Dr. Tim Ysteboe was serving Hillside Lutheran Brethren Church in Succasunna, New Jersey when he passed away in November of 2009.

We Believe: Commentary on the Statement of Faith
by Dr. Timothy Ysteboe

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