A theologian said that the greatest calling God gives a person is to be a parent. Another claimed the greatest calling is to be a spouse. For me, the greatest calling in life is to be a child, because, in being a child, one can be a great parent and a great spouse. Let me explain.

Not everyone is going to be a parent, and not everyone is going to be a spouse. God gives to each person according to his will. Some he will bless with children. Some he will bless with a spouse. Some he will bless with money. Whatever blessings God gives, we are to manage them. Stewardship is our management of everything God gives us: our money, our kids, and our gifts and talents. God is the real owner of all these things, and he gives them to us as a trust responsibility to manage. This is simply part of his bigger calling to us – to be his children.

Some months ago we learned that Rebecca, our third daughter, had a hole in her heart that would require surgery before she was six months old. Then two months ago, the doctor found that part of her brain was smooth, meaning that the neurons did not migrate to the proper place as they should in normal brain development. From geneticists we learned the cause of these symptoms: Rebecca was missing part of a chromosome. With this deletion, as it is called, a baby would probably have some of the following: heart, brain and kidney defects; developmental delays and seizures. This is a rare disease known as Miller-Dieker Syndrome.

Of course, I was driven to learn as much as possible on the internet about Miller-Dieker Syndrome. There I read that “death tends to occur in infancy.”

What do you do when you hear news like this? Perhaps you ask God why this would happen to you. Perhaps you look back on your life wondering what you did wrong that this should happen to one you love. But that’s the wrong approach; rather, we should look to God for answers. I asked what God was doing in my baby’s life, and I asked, “What am I able to do for my baby?”

At that time I was writing a sermon series on stewardship. I heard financial advisor Dave Ramsey say, “All that we have, all that we are, is not ours, but God’s.” Then I understood that Rebecca Faith McIvor is not mine or my wife’s, she is God’s. God has entrusted Becky to her parents, just the way she is, defects or no defects, syndrome or no syndrome, for however long she is in this world, whether a month or a year, or Lord willing, even 100 years. But she is God’s baby – not mine.

From this perspective, the world does not revolve around us, but around God. We might think we are in control of everything, but it is really God in control. Whatever happens is from God or allowed by God, so we need to trust in him. Our lives are not our own, but Christ lives in us (Galatians 2:20). Only by God’s grace can we be children of God. Only because Jesus came and died are we able to live – now in his grace and forever with him.

Many potentially difficult decisions had to be made for Becky. But they became simple when based on a proper view of ourselves and the child God entrusted to us. If I considered Becky as my child, I might have made self-centered decisions. Instead the decisions were based on being good stewards of the precious gift that God gave us.

Some of us are called to be parents, some to be spouses, but each of us is called to be his child. Out of this highest calling we are able to be great parents, great spouses, or be great at anything God wants us to be. You see, a child depends on its parents for food, clothing, shelter, everything. So it is with us and God. We need God’s help in all matters – easy or difficult – and in caring for the things he has entrusted to us. We can count on him to deliver.

Becky is doing o.k. for now. We met with the doctors before she was released from the hospital. They said that Rebecca will not develop past a three- to six-month-old level. Earlier they said she would not live past infancy. We know and trust that God wants what is best for us and for our Becky. We have seen him at work in and through her life already. We will continue to pray for God to keep using her for his glory, while having the faith that if he chooses to do that through her healing, then he is more than able to do so. We praise God for all he has done for our little girl as he has entrusted her to us, her parents.

Stewardship goes beyond giving to the Lord. It means being great managers of what he has given us – that all might be for his glory. Praise be to God who entrusts us with his gifts!

Rev. Dirk McIvor serves as pastor of Nanuet LBC, Nanuet, NY.

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